Ramblings of a waiting mother.
What a long and winding road this journey is. I'm not a patient person by nature. I do love to plan things, but things that I have a date for. I know I am suppose to trust in God that Gracie will be home in his time, and I know this is the case, however, I'm having a really hard time with that.
I know that God has put things in the order in which they are suppose to occur and I'm thankful for each and every gift he has given me.
I only "whine" or "cry" on certain people's shoulders, I know that our friends and family not in the adoption world don't understand. I've really had no problem with Gracie coming home in a year, that was my plan, all along I was set on 01/2008.
Penny, who is one of Gods gift and is paper chasing with the same agency, called them today to see what they wait time actually is. They are now saying 24 - 26 months. I've been stressing for the last week or so about the wait, and now this. I'm still hoping and praying that things will again pick up after the May 1st deadline for the new rules.
If she is not home until 2009, that will make me 41. Am I going to be too old? What do I do with myself for 2 years? My heart just aches when I think of all the children without families, all these women who have babies and don't want them. What happens to Gracie if something happens to me before she comes home, will Paul Ray be allowed to adopt her, would he go without me, my brain races through each day with these thoughts. I may be crazy by then. UHHHHHHHHH!
On a side note, one thing that helps are the little ones in our family. I had my two nephews, Christopher and Hunter (Hunter still does not like me) today. My nephew Adam has his first T-ball game tomorrow that should be fun. And there's my best friend Bonny's daughter, Ashlee Gail. UPDATE, she just called as I finished this post. She had her first softball game tonight, and they won 18-6. She is extremly smart and really into basketball and softball! I look for great things to come from this child.
I've got more fabric to post, I'll do that this weekend. My mom also bought her a cute little spring dress. At this rate she'll need two rooms when she comes home.
Gracie, I love you and cant wait until you are home. Most people think I'm crazy, you're not even born yet, but I do love you.
Love Always, Momma
What a long and winding road this journey is. I'm not a patient person by nature. I do love to plan things, but things that I have a date for. I know I am suppose to trust in God that Gracie will be home in his time, and I know this is the case, however, I'm having a really hard time with that.
I know that God has put things in the order in which they are suppose to occur and I'm thankful for each and every gift he has given me.
I only "whine" or "cry" on certain people's shoulders, I know that our friends and family not in the adoption world don't understand. I've really had no problem with Gracie coming home in a year, that was my plan, all along I was set on 01/2008.
Penny, who is one of Gods gift and is paper chasing with the same agency, called them today to see what they wait time actually is. They are now saying 24 - 26 months. I've been stressing for the last week or so about the wait, and now this. I'm still hoping and praying that things will again pick up after the May 1st deadline for the new rules.
If she is not home until 2009, that will make me 41. Am I going to be too old? What do I do with myself for 2 years? My heart just aches when I think of all the children without families, all these women who have babies and don't want them. What happens to Gracie if something happens to me before she comes home, will Paul Ray be allowed to adopt her, would he go without me, my brain races through each day with these thoughts. I may be crazy by then. UHHHHHHHHH!
On a side note, one thing that helps are the little ones in our family. I had my two nephews, Christopher and Hunter (Hunter still does not like me) today. My nephew Adam has his first T-ball game tomorrow that should be fun. And there's my best friend Bonny's daughter, Ashlee Gail. UPDATE, she just called as I finished this post. She had her first softball game tonight, and they won 18-6. She is extremly smart and really into basketball and softball! I look for great things to come from this child.
I've got more fabric to post, I'll do that this weekend. My mom also bought her a cute little spring dress. At this rate she'll need two rooms when she comes home.
Gracie, I love you and cant wait until you are home. Most people think I'm crazy, you're not even born yet, but I do love you.
Love Always, Momma
1 comment:
Hi-
I'm new to your blog but I saw your comments on the CCAI Jan/Feb LID and I just want to say I feel ya big time. I'm going to be 41 and this will be our first child. The thought of a 26 month wait is very hard but I have to swallow the bitter pill. Maybe we will get through it together. We live in Savannah, GA
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